Reflections

Reflections

On a regular basis I reflect on my life. How am I doing as a mother, wife, or daughter? When reflecting on my life I have never shared my conclusions. Confiding in others about my weaknesses is about as much fun as ten minutes spent in a dentist’s chair. I find it to be even more uncomfortable to shout my own praises. Consequently, you can imagine my heart plummeting to my feet when I learned I would have to write a reflective essay. I will attempt to asses my strengths as well as my weaknesses and to analyze my progress as a creative writer throughout this term.

In the first essay I wrote for class entitled, “What Do I Want to be When I Grow Up” I wrote, “In the past, I have enjoyed my English classes, particularly the literature portion of those classes." For the first time I have found writing to be rewarding. Perhaps this is because I find pleasure in the creative process. When I enjoy the project I am working on, I take a greater sense of pride in the result. If I am able to make a personal connection to my topic, the words flow smoothly from my mind to my fingertips as they fly across the computer’s keyboard. This course allowed me to stretch my mind. In the past if asked for an opinion on most topics, I would usually remain neutral. However, through this course I have discovered that I have an opinion on countless issues. I have a strong voice for conveying that opinion with paper and ink.

On numerous occasions throughout this course our English instructor quoted, “Writing is hard work.” It is hard work, it requires the author to understand and utilize the reading, writing, and thinking connection. Over the last seven weeks I have thought a great deal about the reading, writing, and thinking connection. What does it mean to me as a scholar? What does it mean to me as a citizen of this world? For me the reading, writing, and thinking connection are individual activities that rely on one another to increase in skill and power. The more I read and think, the more powerful my written words become. The more I write, the more I want to read. The more I read, the deeper my thoughts have become. The reading, writing, thinking connection is a cycle that perpetuates itself. As a citizen of this society, the reading, writing, thinking connection gives me the power to express my opinion. While I am certain my opinion will not be the catalyst for radical change, it might be a spark that ignites a small fire in a few. As a scholar I understand that our world is radically changing right before our eyes. Technology is a fast moving train careening past us. The only way to catch the train of technology is to be a critical thinker. Since technology is changing at an incredible rate; there is virtually no way to teach the new skills needed. One simply has to jump on the train and enjoy the ride, hopefully learning along the way.

Passive sentences were one of my weaknesses at the beginning of the course. I try hard to remember it is imperative to use strong nouns and active verbs. Now I need to work on invoking the five senses of my reader: feeling, hearing, seeing, smelling, and tasting. I love losing myself in the written word, especially when the author has painted a clear picture for me making me feel as if I am a character in the story. This is where I want to take my writing. I want to invite my readers into my writing, encouraging them to stay for a while. A secret dream of mine, for many years now, is to become a famous author. I would love to be a mix of Danielle Steel and Mary Higgins Clark, weaving a delicate yet steamy romance with an intriguing mystery.

At the beginning of the term, I was not confidant in my comprehension of grammatical rules. Although there are a handful of grammatical rules I am still trying to gain a better understanding of, I now carry a deeper sense of confidence. If I am unsure about a rule, I now know where to find the answer. The, “Easy Writer,” textbook we have referred to all term is now a constant companion when I sit down to write. Even though I have increased confidence in my understanding of grammar, I still shake like a feather when it comes to commas. Commas do not scare me as much as before, but they are still the bane of my existence. I am working on the proper use of commas and will continue to work on them. My favorite punctuation is the semi-colon; they tend to cause me trouble. I think with practice either I will grasp the proper use of semi-colons, or I will simply learn to live without them. I now realize even the seasoned writing professional continually works on grammar. The English language seems to be in a constant state of transformation. As our language changes, so does our grammar and the rules that dictate the proper use of our grammar.

With immense trepidation, I leave the comforts of creative writing for the unknown world of research writing. While I do not know what the next course holds for me, I do know that I carry a sense of confidence in my ability to use my words to convey my message. In addition, I carry the skills I have gained while hoping that as I conquer my weaknesses I will be able to add them to my bag of tricks.

Written 28 September 2009